Yesterday evening I was in Avatar. I don’t think you have heard of it, it’s a little small-budget indie movie that only runs in arthouse cinemas. Or something like that.

Sorry, I am not overly impressed. Sure the 3D stuff looked fabulous – for about 15 – 20 minutes. Then I got used to it and it couldn’t distract me from the story anymore. And you can split the story into three elements: it’s either boring, melodramatic or cheesy – and not in a good way.

I had quite a number of *groan* moments, especially towards the end. For example when he tried to deliver a speech (and I love speeches!) that was a mixture of Braveheart (Unite the clans!) and Independence Day (Tomorrow we will celebrate our Independence Day! [or something along those lines]). Or when the evil guy drew a knife from his Mech suit(!!!) and then good guy says: “I hoped you’d say that” – Stallone at his best! – But wait, no Stallone in the movie!! And when she held him in his arms I waited for him to say: *Darth Vader rattle* “Only once I want to see you with my own eyes.” (he didn’t, but he might as well).

When I saw the chief warrior indian Na’vi I instinctively had to think of a Mohawk native American, I couldn’t help it.

On the technical side: As I said it looked great except for one effect: When a real person was about one quarter “deep” into the picture I always had the feeling that the proportions weren’t right, they all looked to thin. It was OK when they were direct at the front or in the background, but in this section they just didn’t look right.
In the beginning I also had the feeling as if the persons were to small in comparison to their surroundings. I’m not talking about the Na’vi, I noticed it long before I saw the first Na’vi, I’m talking about real persons standing around their own research utilities. But maybe that’s both just my eyes.

I simply can’t understand why someone spends a couple of hundred million dollars for special effects but is too cheap to pay a decent story writer.

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Categories: Cinema
Tags: Avatar · Braveheart · Independence Day